Kentanji Brown Jackson is turning Japanese
Special Tina Toon
Cartoon published 02/02/2026
Leave it to Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson to deliver the most ridiculous word salad of the Supreme Court term.
During yesterday’s oral arguments on President Trump’s executive order ending birthright citizenship for children of illegal immigrants, Justice Jackson decided to treat the 14th Amendment like a karaoke machine.
While questioning the Solicitor General, she launched into this gem: “I stole that man’s wallet… and as a result, I think I’m turning Japanese… I think I’m turning Japanese… I really think so!”
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(Yes, she actually went there with a twisted “allegiance” analogy involving stealing a wallet in Japan to argue that temporary visitors somehow owe “allegiance” to the U.S. — therefore their kids get automatic citizenship.)
This is the same DEI hire who once couldn’t define what a woman is. Now she’s on the Supreme Court mangling both basic biology and the clear meaning of the 14th Amendment — which was never intended to grant instant citizenship to the children of foreigners here illegally or on temporary visas.
Yesterday’s arguments centered on Trump’s push to restore the original understanding of citizenship: You must be subject to the complete jurisdiction of the United States (not owing primary allegiance to a foreign country). Jackson’s performance? Pure judicial clownery.
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This is what happens when identity politics puts unqualified activists in lifetime positions of power. The Republic deserves better than Supreme Court justices treating the Constitution like improv night at a comedy club.Sorry, Justice Jackson … you’re not “Turning Japanese.” You’re simply turning the highest court in the land into a national joke.
—The GrrrTeam
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