Under the sea… under the sea…🎶

Cartoon published 12/03/2025

Thanks to President Trump turning narco-subs and go-fast boats into artificial reefs, the entire Caribbean just experienced the biggest accidental dispensary drop in history.

Billions in premium Colombian marching powder are now gently snowing onto the ocean floor like a winter wonderland for fish who never asked for a Red Bull-level personality upgrade.

Suddenly Flounder’s doing 360s around coral heads screaming “I CAN SEE SOUND!” while a very chill octopus is experiencing a whole new level of saltwater. Even the sharks are acting weird; normally stone-cold killers, they’re now just stoned.

So next time you’re snorkeling and a clownfish swims up, offers you a tiny seashell pipe and asks if you’ve “ever really looked at your fins, man?”,  just remember: that’s not Nemo. That’s Nemo after three lines and a dream.

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Trump’s crew—led by War Secretary Hegseth—has vaporized over 20 speed demons in the Caribbean and Pacific since September, claiming each fiery kaboom saves 25,000 American lives by nuking the fentanyl flow before it hits our shores, all while humming “Under the Sea” as the contraband confetti rains down like manna for manta rays.

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Thank President Trump for the war on drugs… and thank the narcos for the accidental war on sobriety in the entire Atlantic.

Darling it’s better, down where it’s wetter, take it from meeeee! 🎶 🐠